Would you date your ex?

“Back with the Ex” is an Australian reality TV series featuring former couples who want to give it another go. It’s had our team reminiscing about their past and contemplating if we have unfinished business with old lovers. How many of us are thinking of “the one that got away” or the guy we didn’t quite have closure with?

A one-night stand, a holiday romance, badly timed relationship, long term ex that you just can’t forget…if you had the opportunity to give it another shot, would you?

The reasons behind the split will obviously have a huge impact on whether you would even consider it. Especially if there was some sort of deceit which led to the break up. Cheating is not only hard to forgive, but to forget is a completely different ball game. This would involve not speaking of it again and moving forward with no resentment. Easier said than done.

When we are feeling a little lonely or hitting a wall on the dating front, it is easy to look back at photos and remember all those happy memories. Have you sincerely missed them as a person? Or have you not met anyone else yet so you are convincing yourself that you could have the, “I wrote you 365 letters. I wrote you every day for a year. It wasn’t over… it still isn’t over,” moment from the Notebook. (If you haven’t watched this: Do it)

Another thing to consider is time. You aren’t the people you were back then. For good or bad, they may feel like strangers. It could be a complete disappointment and the person you remembered and have been daydreaming about all this time should have been left where they were: in the past. On the bright side, at least you would have closure enabling you to move on.

On the other hand, the care free, young things you were then have grown up and the timing is perfect. It could be the best thing you ever did!

Have you tried going back or are thinking about getting back in touch with an old flame? We’d love to hear about it.




  • Avatar Claire Gaddis says:

    Sure did and it ended in disaster!! Got back after splitting up after a very bad break up…first time meeting my friends….caused a fight after being very drunk. Didn’t have any contact for months then after speaking to each other again and an apology and thinking we had something special we got back together (although my friends and family didn’t know this) but after a couple of months I ended things because he wanted to go on holiday with his ex and their daughter. Sounds petty but he said that he would be sharing a bed with his ex!!! Who I also discovered aren’t divorced yet!! So technically still man and wife! You think you would know someone after a year! Can’t contemplate dating any more ?

  • Avatar Ruth says:

    I did and although there were good times and I would never change it for the world as we now have a child together I can honestly say if it wasn’t for our son I would go back in time and tell 2012 me to ‘BACK THE F*CK UP’ before I made that fatal mistake. People don’t change, they just get better at pretending

  • Avatar Cat says:

    Highly unlikely! No matter how lonely can’t go back and change the past- people don’t change as commented above. Just get better at pretending. My ex has been a serial cheater from he was a teenager and at 28 still hasn’t changed- just better at hiding everything- couldn’t trust people like that! Women deserve better!!

  • Avatar Vania says:

    I have to be honest with myself if i want to keep going on but yes i will deffo take one of my ex but only ONE…it’a not because i feel lonely or other… our relationship was short but intense and ended nearly 4 years ago but what and how i felt i can describe and when i think about it something inside me shifts. That was an big unfineshed business. For me he was the right person at the wrong time. When we started dating i wasn’t in a good state of mind and that i think affected our relationship. Funny how this post comes exactly on the 4th anniversary of the day we met for the first time. I know he’s in a relationship for more than 3 years but it will be good to hear from him…

  • Avatar Erlena says:

    No, because they were all bumholes who was not worthy of me due to their utterly pathetic lack of balls or honesty to themselves. I have a big issue with people not being honest and not communicating. I’m not clairvoyant, especially with men who are in denial. I have a child for one and I wished we could make it work, but narcissistics aren’t exactly long term material!

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